I celebrated my birthday by taking a nice drive with my kids. Taking a drive wasn’t the way I wanted to celebrate it, but that’s the way God planned. I wanted to buy a fancy gown, rent a limo, get a hotel, and have a nice dinner. The last time I treated myself to something luxurious was in my twenties when I took a solo trip to St. Croix. This birthday, I wanted to embrace my new single life and everything I overcame. However, I spent my special day with the two people who matters most and who loves me unconditionally.
They were more excited for my birthday than I was. They created a special box with drawings of God and the three of us. It may seem sad to other people, but this birthday was better compared to all my other birthdays, even the St. Croix trip. I didn’t have anxiety. I wasn’t depressed. I was calm for the most part. They did act up a little bit, but I was at peace, and I felt loved. It was different but it was better.
The drive was beautiful. As I reflected on the past year and my life, I wondered if I accomplished everything I was supposed to so far. Well, the year isn’t over yet, and even though I haven’t reached every goal, I do believe I’ve accomplished a lot to be 39 years old.
I’ve never felt better spiritually, emotionally, mentally, and physically (I can blame the extra baby weight on old age now LOL). I’m finally confident in my body and skin.
After my divorce earlier this year, I had no excuses to hold back. It was an opportunity to grow even closer to the Lord and rebuild myself. I got to redefine who I am, and I didn’t need anyone’s permission to thrive in my own bubble. I spent this summer doing things I always enjoyed or wanted to do. I took singing lessons, I danced in my house, and I created new things. I spent time working on my gifts, talents, and improving my skills. I baked from scratch, installed new floors, hosted the first season of my podcast, Living with True Purpose, and published my book, Braving Birth. I fearlessly stepped out of my comfort zone. It took 30 something years to get to this season.
I overcame trials, tribulations, afflictions, hardships, life-changing experiences, losses, and the list goes on and on. I survived every dart the enemy threw at me. I healed from childhood trauma, teenage trauma, adult trauma, mental, verbal, and emotional abuse. I healed from rejection, gossip, lies, mistreatment, abandonment, and broken or failed relationships/friendships.
As I continue to walk in my purpose, there’s no pretending, faking, or hiding who I am. I want new healthy friendships/relationships, a new Kingdom husband who is rooted in Christ, new family, and new successful business opportunities. I’ve experienced the goodness of God in a new way, and there’s no more settling. I want what God wants for me.
Although I haven’t arrived yet, I’m still thriving at my own pace and on His perfect timing. I’m thankful for everything the Lord is doing in my life. (Job 8:7).
The biggest take away from the last 30 something years of my life is this: I am who God says I am. I am chosen. I will have what God says I can have and do what he’s called me to do.